The Beginning of THE BEGINNING

Spring.

There is something extra special about the spring-time...the budding flowers, the leaves that begin to grow back on the trees,  the "love" in the air, the sun that shines a little brighter, the grass turning a little greener, and; for every New York City dweller - the smiles that begin to appear on every face... as if they were hidden (or in hibernation) for the winter.

Many people liken the spring to new beginnings... a fresh start.  At least for myself, spring has always meant that something new and "good" was coming - that I was FINALLY going to see the "fruit" of all that I had labored in from the previous months.  

I believed in spring very much - put high hopes in it's fruit-bearing goodness.  I believed in it so much...UNTIL I sat down to write the first blog that i've written in over a year - about 30 minutes ago...and realized that it was time for a new start.  Perhaps, even...a NEW BEGINNING. 

"But, it's Fall."

That is exactly what I said to myself...thinking it would change what I knew in my heart was a timely "feeling."  

"But Fall is right before Winter...and winter is my least favorite.  Why would NOW be a good time for a beginning?!"  

Again, what I ALSO said to myself.

When I say "myself"...I actually mean myself - and God.  I find my conversations with Him to be hilarious most days - because I imagine Him waiting patiently as I talk myself through a solution that only He can fix. (a little side note - hilarious, but true)

As I sat down to write - after a year of delaying what I knew I was supposed to be doing (I know better...but I'm sure it has to do with running from what we're afraid of...etc etc.) I clicked on the old blog that I used to write on to add another entry.  

That is when I felt the holy spirit say, "No - it's time for something new...a New Beginning." 

So - here I am... not knowing at all where these new few months will take me.  But if there is one thing I know more than anything - it's that I can trust in Jesus with my life - and not just the parts of my life that are easy to let go of...MY WHOLE LIFE.

(2 Samuel 7:28:  "For you are God, O Sovereign Lord. Your words are truth, and you have promised these good things to your servant.") 

(Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart, and lean not in your own understanding - but in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will give you the desires of your heart.")

I know that this is the beginning of believing NEW things - believing more like He does for my life - for other's lives.  This is a time for HARVEST... a time to receive and yet prepare for what's ahead. 

So I step ahead. Vulnerably speaking,...with a broken heart...feeling a bit let down by what feels like rejection.  However, I KNOW He is faithful to not only heal it...but to give me peace while I may never have an answer as to "why." (Philippians 4:6-9)

But - this is not really about me... it's about all the people I will have a conversation with one day.  It is about all the stories people will share with me about their own heart breaks and failures.  And I will be able to share the undeniable faithfulness of my God. 

We often respond at the time of "harvest" with: "finally...all the things I've been waiting for...are mine!"...When our response should be more of thankfulness and preparedness for the season ahead.  

We can't predict the severity of the winter ahead any more than we can predict the weather (these days)...but we can prepare for it.  

This is my time to start preparing...no more looking backwards...no more wishing I had something that wasn't ever intended to be mine. 

I'm grateful for this NEW BEGINNING.

"Then He who is seated on the throne said, "behold, I am making all things new!" Then he said, "Write these words down, for they are trustworthy and true." Revelations 21:5

(I love sunsets... this is a little over a week ago in Texas)