By the Grace of God

 A few months ago...I came across a song by Katy Perry. It was a song I NEEDED to hear.  And before you think or say anything judgmental towards me, please understand that God is so gracious. He's so gracious and sovereign that He will use anything to reach out to us in a way that we need.

(Moving on...)

So there I was, sitting at my desk at work.  When all of the sudden, this song came on. My friend had warned me about this song. She said, "You NEED to listen to this..."  I'm usually skeptical when people message me stuff like that. Not because I don't like to be teachable, but because I don't always feel like you (people) know what I'm going through...enough to tell me what song is good for me to hear. But...she was right. And I was humbled....again.

These are the words I heard.... (Katy Perry's - "By the Grace of God")

Was 27 surviving my return of Saturn

A long vacation didn’t sound so bad

Was full of secrets locked up tight like iron mountain

Running on empty so out of gas

Thought I wasn’t enough

Found I wasn’t so tough

Layin’ on the bathroom floor

We were living on a fault line

And I felt the fault was all mine

Couldn’t take it anymore

By the grace of God (there was no other way)

I picked myself back up (I knew I had to stay)

I put one foot in front of the other

And I looked in the mirror and decided to stay

Wasn’t gonna let love take me out that way

I thank my sister for keeping my head above the water

When the truth was like swallowing sand

Now every morning, there is no more mourning

Oh, I can finally see myself again

I know I am enough

Possible to be loved

It was not about me

Now I have to rise above

Let the universe call the bluff

Yeah, the truth’ll set you free

Within a matter of 30 seconds, I was a mess.  Sitting there in my uncomfortable desk chair...staring off into oblivion at the two computer screens in front of me.  I remember thinking, "She wrote my song."  

Now, my life has not been horrible, or tragic when compared to many others' situations...but I will say this: I have walked through some dark days.  And I do not apologize for saying that. But I will gladly share my journey with you because I think someone will always need to hear it. (side note: be very careful with who you share your struggles with while walking through them...always use wisdom and caution because NOT everyone should, and can handle your business).

I'm not sharing this because I feel like my life is exactly what I want it to be right now. I'm sharing this with you because I needed to hear the message in this song...

By the Grace of God (there was no other way)
I picked myself back up (I knew I had to stay)
I put one foot in front of the other
And I looked in the mirror, and decided to stay...

There were so many times when I wanted to run away...leave...quit..and never look back.  I believe, that although God is loving, and kind in his approach to our inability to trust Him, I don't think that "quitting" is a part of his plan...ever.  

I think the best thing we can tell ourselves is to STAY.  Some days, you've literally got to look in the mirror and tell yourself to STAY.

Speak to your spirit/heart, and tell it what/how to react! Get agressive...and fight for your life! 

"The LORD is my strength and my shield; in him my heart trusts, and I am helped; my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to him." Psalm 28:7

I will say this more often than not...the word of God is so powerful.  Use it...as much as possible. Maybe the answers to your questions never come, but that doesn't negate the goodness of our God.  And it definitely doesn't negate His promises over your life.  

So your life is a mess right now?  I know you feel like you're alone, but you aren't.  The feeling of loneliness, fear, doubt in what you once thought God spoke to you, broken heart, depression... I've been there.  

It's exhausting...carrying on.  It's also humiliating, thinking that you should be in a "better place." That's reality. So what can we do about it?

When you are faced with the very thing that breaks your heart...several times in a day/week...keep pushing on.  When you're not sure if you'll ever be "ok"...Keep moving.  Keep looking heavenward. 

There were days when I couldn't listen to even my best friends...because even their advise (although..it was biblical, wise advise) wasn't good enough. I had to stick my face in the bible and read.  I had to read the same "faith" confession verse..over and over. I read it until I actually started to believe it.  Did it take time? Absolutely. Did I have to remind myself everyday of that verse? Absolutely.

Do yourself a favor.  Don't assume silly things like "no one understands me..." But instead, assume that your situation is something that many have walked through - because that is probably true.  Even more than all of that - GOD WILL NEVER LEAVE US.  His word reminds us of that:

"Never will I leave you...Never will I forsake you."  Deuteronomy 31:6

In those moments when you feel like you're not getting any better... I challenge you to declare these words over  your life:

"I will live and not die. I will Proclaim what the Lord has done!"  Psalm 118:17 

Choose to thank the Lord for what you are trusting Him for...BEFORE you see it happen.  Thankfulness breeds incredible things right before your eyes.  It's not magic...it's the Kingdom of heaven at work in your life.  So whether or not you see it, God is at work...and He is moving around the pieces of your life in such a way that none of us could possibly understand. That's what makes Him, God. 

By the grace of God, you WILL carry on.  By the grace of God, you WILL be whole again. He WILL heal your heart.  He WILL restore your family.  And He WILL be your closest friend..and dearest companion along the way.  

I think it's time for us to stop complaining about where we are at, get up - and start to speak "life" over our situation.  Declare the goodness of the Lord!  Take it ONE step at a time. 

By the grace of GOD...you will be alright.  Keep your head up...there is so much hope in knowing that God has got YOU...and He's not letting go.  

HE is all you need.