One of my favorite things to do since living in the city (NYC) is to wave and say hello to strangers on the street. I love to do this, because I’m usually greeted back with a look a confusion. Sadly, I’m not sure people are used to genuine kindness from a stranger. It happens, but perhaps maybe not as often as it should – I’m guilty of not doing it enough.
I also love to compliment strangers as well. Some respond with surprise and gratefulness, while others are awkwardly trying to forget I ever said anything. I’m not sure that we know how to respond to a genuine compliment. Is there a motive behind that compliment? Do you need something? Want something? What’s the catch? It’s sad, isn’t it?
I find it intimidating to be kind to a stranger when it’s not reciprocated. I feel foolish, and kind of dorky. Here I am with a goofy grin on my face, and the other person is just staring at me in annoyance. Oh well. At least I still did it.
In most recent years, I’ve come to notice something really profound when I take a moment to listen, acknowledge, or say hello to another person (heck, even a stranger). We aren’t as DIFFERENT from one another as we think we are.
We all want the same three things: Acceptance, love, and forgiveness. The details, years, and experiences in between those three common themes can vary with each person, but at the core of every human being, is a longing for those three things. It doesn’t matter how confident a person can appear. You might even look at some man in a nice suit, and think, “oh. Well he must have it all together. He must have a substantial amount of funds in his account, and here I am struggling from paycheck to paycheck.” When in reality, that man may have the poorest and saddest heart imaginable. He may be spending 100 hours in the office, just to escape the fact that he has a marriage that is falling apart, as a result of the tragic loss of his first born just a few months prior.
We’ve all suffered loss. All of us. We have all longed to be accepted by someone, loved by someone, and forgiven by someone.
I think sometimes, we try to separate ourselves from another individual because we’ve been hurt. Maybe we choose to separate from another people group because we’ve been continually hurt, ostracized and abused by an individual (or individuals) from that people group. Wounds are real. But even more real, is the act of forgiveness. I don’t say any of this lightly, because of the current state of the “heart and soul” of our country, and need I say, WORLD. The idea that unforgiveness is an validated way to continue living your life, breaks my heart in a million ways. I can’t fix it. Honestly, it’s incredibly overwhelming, because that's how a lot of us live. We feel that there is no need to forgive someone who hurt us, or someone we love. We are happy to live our lives holding on to a suitcase filled with unforgiveness.
Here's a thought: That's not a burden we were meant to carry. Stop packing that suitcase with more crap. There's a Savor for carrying that kind of thing. His name is Jesus. More on that later.
What if we decided to look at others differently? What if, instead of assuming the worst about others – EVEN WHEN they treat us unjustly, that we extended kindness and compassion? It will probably be the most uncomfortable act that we do. We all know that ONE person who doesn't deserve any kindness. What if we were to look at ourselves in the metaphorical mirror of the forgiveness scale we so easily judge others? Would we extend kindness then? We should.
Quite honestly, forgiving and choosing to see the best in others can be incredibly frightening. It can make us feel weak, and not in control. When in fact, we are even more in control than when we give into the anger, bitterness, judgment.
Here’s a challenge for all of us. It may even change your whole life - starting with your immediate perspective: Reach out to a stranger – someone that you’ve never met and probably would never normally speak to. Deliberately pick someone that intimidates you. Start a conversation with them, compliment them, smile at them and say hello…wherever that leads you. You may find that person to be the most incredible individual that you’ve ever met. You may find a story within that person that speaks louder than the differences you thought you had with them.
Be a light in a very dark world. Reach down into the deepest part of your heart and find the courage to be different. Be that one person smiling on the subway when everyone else is grumbling and glaring at you in disgust. You never know what your smile, hello, compliment, and listening ear will be for another person. It may even be the difference between life and death for someone.
Jesus forgave when He knew we would betray and turn against Him. He forgave when He knew we’d be the ones crucifying Him. He loves us, even when He knows we are about to do something stupid. He looks at us with so much love that our minds would probably explode if He were here in person. I want to love like that. I want to love so liberally, so unconditionally, that others find me to be foolish. So, I guess…what I really want to be is that girl with the big goofy grin on her face after giving someone a genuine compliment, hello, or wave. I might be called “weird” here and there, but that’s just because it’s not normal.
Let’s make it normal.
No comments:
Post a Comment